babbling

2008-07-02T17:09:00.000-07:00

I was hoping a discusion would have deveoped - oh well I will keep plugging away :)
I will wite an update later today

sometimes darkness....

2008-06-29T13:28:00.000-07:00

No one wants to be in the dark -(let me clarify here - I do not mean darkness as in evil or the lack of truth. I do mean the unknown, isolation, pain, suffering and loss.)

All these things we spend so much effort avoiding and with good cause; it is not natural to want to suffer. Even that desire to avoid pain testifies to a lack within our spirits and our world. An un-fulfillment that we carry knowing deeply that; "It isn't supposed to be this way".

Therein lies the paradox of faith and beauty, that being an absence teaches us what we need and leads us on - that ache you feel, that desire you have is what leads you and ultimately if we go about life looking for the fulfilment in the wrong places and the unhealthy places what we find is disappointment upon disappointment - each disappointment compounding the previous and forcing pressure upon the soul.

That pressure combined with our sense and beliefs about who we are (IE. our identity) is the deciding factor of the internal outcome of our spiritual health. I will put it another way - If you believe that you are not worth the effort and then some calamity comes along in life - then you will be emotionally devastated or even destroyed. Now that is not to say that if you had a great sense of worth and self value you would not be hurt or emotionally wounded - it just means that internally you would still stand. There are other factors to consider as well - but I belie this is the main one.

So where do you find and get your worth from? Is it yourself? Is it you family or friends? Your vocation? Your bank account? Your interests? Your past, present, future? Your faith in God?
I will share where I get mine from in comments - I am interested to see if a discussion forms here - if not, no worries. If so - then maybe a resolution to each persons needs can be found. Maybe.

Sometimes darkness is the only teacher that can teach what we truely need to know for ourselves - how to be better, how to find beauty and love, how to have faith, where we went wrong, what we can do to go right - and many many more realitys.

Test post #1

2008-06-28T19:31:00.000-07:00

When no amount of praying will bring back what's lost and only a few know what your suffering has cost. The wind comes whipping and cracking forcing you back and your heart reveals all that you lack. And all at once you realize you haven't been listening to what you needed to hear. You let go of yourself and drown out your fear. With a comforting drowning , you die your own death and reach out for God to draw on his breath.

"Whoever seeks to find his life will lose itm but whoever seekss to lose his life, for my sake, will find it."Quote from Jesus Matthew 10:39

The Quality of Night

babbling

sometimes darkness....

Test post #1